Sunday, October 10, 2010

Sometimes I like Japan

...but only when I don't leave my gaijin shell.

When I do, I invariably come across grotesque and offensive deviations of human behaviour.

Yesterday, on a trip to Yokohama and its station environs to have lunch with a friend, I was brutalized by any number of deviant and creepy manifestations, including, but not limited to...

1. An 'information counter' just outside the station, staffed by young women who were trying fervently to become mechanical automatons. They would stare meaningless into space until a member of the public approached them, then reel off their inhuman, blindly-rehearsed spiel. When the person left, they resumed their mummy-like appearance, primly inspecting the empty air about 2 metres in front of them. The whole effect was akin to some souless clockwork-driven machine, dedicated to sucking the blood and spirit out of all humanity.

2. Many instances of shallow, prim midde-aged housewives with their pampered, tiny doll-like little show dogs in their handbags. These little labrats cost thousands of dollars to buy and their owners are taking them for a 'walk'. As I walked I entertained fantasies of Japan collapsing just before Chinese takeover. When this happens, I dreamed, and the riots sweep the train stations, I will grab one of these rats and cheerfully cook it on a stick.

3. A temporary shop opening up and selling 'memorabilia' for some train station anniversary - Chinese made junk of calendars, notebooks, gadgets and toys. The creepy, geeky nerdy 'otaku' types rushing and crowding around made me think of that photo...